LSU Football

1.  QB inconsistency is a concern.  Neither Hatch nor Lee looked comfortable in the offense.  LSU really could have used that game against Troy, but oh well.  Jordan Jefferson didn't exactly light it up either.

2.  You're a bad man, Charlie Scott.  Charles Scott continues to be awesome.

3.  Auburn's offense has no spark.  Seriously.  What kind of football game ends 3 to 2?  Yuck!

Doom Metal and Me

Ever heard of a band called Sleep?

They are awesome.  They're like Black Sabbath but thicker and more ridiculous.  I wish I could pull off Doom Metal, but my sense of melody makes everything sound like pop, which can be good sometimes, but sometimes I want to be like an awesome doom metal.

The album is "Dopesmoker".  The title track is an hour long, and it's about the "Weedian" people on a pilgrimage to the "riff-filled land" and it's awesome.  "Sleep's Holy Mountain" is on right now, and it's even better 1. because it's faster-paced, 2. because it's more diverse and... well, I can't think of a third.  Everything sounds better in threes, but two reasons will have to do.

LSU baseball hit 23 wins last night.  Unbelievable.  The Bayou Blaster Brothers Blake Dean and Matt Clark are incredible.  44 home runs between them this season, and I'm sure there's more to come.

New LSU basketball coach

Trent Johnson, former Stanford head coach, is heading down to the bayou to coach LSU's struggling basketball team.

In his four seasons at Stanford, he led his team to an 81-40 record, three NCAA tournament appearances, and a spot in the Sweet 16 just recently, all while coaching in the Pac-10 Conference, which is one of the hardest conferences for Basketball.

I don't blame him for heading down to the Bayou State. He'll have a program with great tradition, and if LSU becomes successful and the fanbase is rejuvenated, awesome Tiger fans.  He'll also be in Louisiana, an area that produces a lot of black people talent for recruiting. Welcome to Baton Rouge, Trent.

Now it's time to think of a T-Shirt slogan that celebrates our new coach.

"Bent on Trent"? Nah, but we'll think of something eventually.

Perrilloux returns to the team on Sunday

I guess it was a misunderstanding after all whatever happened at Kona Bar and Grill.

I decided I will defend Les Miles.  He is a coach that won a National Championship and has a 34-6 record.  So if Les says Ryan Perrilloux stays, he stays.

Aw, Ryan. You're like that little badass kid in the principal's office every other day, but nothing you do is bad enough to expel you.

Miles will be portrayed as weak in the media. They will bash him just like they did on his road to the national championship.

But Les Miles knows that football is not a popularity contest, and there's a difference between doing what's best for the team and doing what the media thinks you should.

If Les was a losing coach, I wouldn't be so nice.  But instead, he's a winning coach who has won a National Championship, and I'm no one.

Here come five months of Miles/Perrilloux bashing by opponents and media before the season begins and the Tigers dominate.

He's still going to miss the spring game along with all of spring practice, but he will get to participate in the Washington DC trip.

Screw getting sick.

I wanted to record a few songs this week.  But I got sick, and my voice is totally shot.

Right now, I'm on two Mucinexes, sudaffed, and two tylenol.  It's not as bad as the one I had last semester during finals.  That one was horrible.

It's a mild cold, but it's annoying.

I went to the Student Health Center.  I told her everything I was doing, and she just said, "yeah, you have a cold.  Just keep doing what your doing."

LSU baseball is playing mediocre.  Ol' Skip Bertman can't seem to hire a good baseball coach, even though baseball is his own sport.  (Bertman is considered one of the top two or three college baseball coaches of all time.  He won five College World Series in a decade's span (1991, 1993, 1996, 1997, 2000.))

Our men's basketball team sucked too.

Well, at least we have our football team and our beautiful crystal football.  Nice.

Lady Tigers basketball is in the Sweet Sixteen.  Sylvia Fowles is a weast (woman beast= weast).

Eating, Running and Singing

I just got back from playing soccer with some friends and nice strangers out on the parade grounds.  I played goalie, because I have decent reflexes and I'm not that fast, but I did do a good bit of running, mostly when retrieving stray shots.  It felt good to get a bit of exercise.

Most of you who know me know that I am fat. Though none of you want to say it to my face.  Like when I make fat jokes about myself and people are like, "Hey don't say that about yourself." I'm not compliment fishing, bitch. I'm making a joke, and I'm trying to make you laugh.  I'm not that sensitive or self-conscious.

I know I'm fat.  I eat unconsciously.  It's not like I think "I am going to gluttonously eat this big bag of chips."  No, I think "I'll have a few chips, and then save them for tomorrow" and before I know it, the bag is empty.  I throw it away, and I completely forget I ate that big fucking bag of chips.

I don't tell people I eat a lot, because three quarters of the food I eat, I don't remember eating.  It just happens that way.  I bet a lot of the really obese people, like the 600 pound dudes, have the same sort of unconscious problem, just a lot worse.

Sometimes I go on long stretches of time where I don't eat that much at all.  It seems that when I'm feeling hungry (not when I just want to eat, but when I actually feel hunger from not eating), I don't want to eat that much.  I tend to lose a lot of weight during these stretches.  It's an unhealthy way to lose weight, but since when do I do things the healthy way?

"I'm a pretty crappy athlete."  That's the beginning of my song "Three Minute Mile", and it's true.  I'm just not.  I did run with St. Paul's Lutheran School in the 4x400 track relay, and we really did win fifth place.  I hated running around that fucking track, so I pretty much jogged instead.

That song's actually about death.  If I ran a three minute mile, I'd probably die.

When I get back to Peachtree City for the summer, I'm getting a bunch of guys to form a backup band.  It will be James Read Hunter and the James Read Hunters, and all the other guys will wear masks of my face, and I'll wear a mask myself, and then I'll whip it off, and it will be my actual face!  Sweet.

Ryan Perrilloux, we love you, and we want to fucking strangle you.

Ryan, you might want to thank the good Lord for making your dad's sperm and your mom's egg meiose that meiosis to make you a superstar athlete-by-genetics, because if you sucked at sports, you'd suck at everything.  It's not shameful to be stupid.  A lot of great athletes are stupid.  A lot of the greatest people in the world are stupid.  You just have to make sure you don't trip over your own stupid decisions.

Like getting into a brawl up in front of Northgate at 2 AM on a school night DURING FOOTBALL SEASON.  Okay, so you got out of it and you might have been at the wrong place at the wrong time.  But in front of a bar at 2 AM on a school night has a tendency not to be the right place or the right time.

Okay, so missing a few classes isn't a big deal, but team meetings definitely are.  You're going to be the starting quarterback.  You're the guy.  Be the guy.

Please, Ryan.  Please stay the fuck out of trouble.  It's not that hard and the payoff will be BIG!  Look at your old teammate JaMarcus Russell.  He got drafted first overall by the Oakland Raiders, and now he has millions of dollars.  JaMarcus Russell also never got into trouble.  See a connection?

I know you can do it, Ryan.